This is a weird level of burnout I've never experienced and with which I'm not prepared to cope.
The freelancing is hard more because of work. Ever since shifting f/t to management I get maybe an hour a week to hack on code. But I'm still at a computer all day.
Coming home to hack on code just doesn't appeal to me. I end up spending 2 hours or so binging YouTube instead and never even open my IDE. :-(
Speaking at conferences and freelancing on the side have both been huge parts of my life for the past decade. Now, though, I'm finding it harder to find joy in either.
The travel wears on me and, because I don't go as much as I used to (3-4 confs a year as opposed to 10-12) I'm less connected to my friends in the community. Makes and event more exhausting than refreshing and takes me away from my daughter.
Puts the current coronavirus scare into perspective for me. The idea of isolating my family from social interaction in the vent it becomes a widespread pandemic is hard.
Could I do it? Probably.
But I also realize I'm in a privileged situation where I have money and am a manager with a super lenient schedule and WFH policy. I could stay home indefinitely if necessary.
Few others can say that.
At work today. With a cold. Everyone keeps telling me to go home.
I feel guilty for being here. That said ...
I live with a toddler and a senior citizen, the latter of which has no health coverage and goes to free clinics to get medical care. I'd feel even more guilty if I stayed home. Particularly if either of them were to catch it.
Instead, sequestering myself in a conf room with hot tea and Lysol to wipe things down afterwards.
The first time I heard the term "digital experience platform" it was from an industry exec mocking a competitor's focus on being classified as such. They're argument: "it's such a phoney classification. It doesn't exist. Such a waste of time and resources."
Fast forward two years. Same executive is now speaking at events about building "digital experience platforms" and is a recognized thought leader in the space.
Life comes at you fast?
Never considered myself a 10x engineer at the time. Only in hindsight. As much as I hate that label, it's and accurate classifier of some engineers.
I keep searching them out and, when I find them, I will protect them with every fiber of my being.
Wrote some code. It took me 90 mins to get things functional. Which is frustrating, because three-years-ago-me would've written the same code in less than an hour.
I fully understand there are some who would spend days on the problem and not get it. I'm not discounting how hard the work is. Just frustrated that my shift into management has resulted in my "code muscle" losing some of its tone.
Better run today on an elliptical. Still getting back to my pace. A little improvement each day helps. #beatyesterday
The more I read and study, and the more experience I gain working with various communities, the more I realize I harbor several ideals that aren't shared by others in my position.
It's eye opening and frustrating at the same time.
Common sense isn't common, y'all.
Things that feel like obvious, empathetic, I-care-for-those-around-me are seen as alien standards to which others struggle to relate.
Not my best run, but happy to be getting back to it in the new year! #beatyesterday
My furnace is on its last legs. Every now and then the thermostat turns it on (or thinks it does) and sits there expecting the house to warm up, only for us to come home to everything below 40 degrees.
It's not the best situation. Especially with a little one in the house.
Finally bought a Nest. I can program a lambda to check it every minute or so and restart the furnace if it fails to kick on. Win-win for my geeky self.
Except the Google setup for Nest? Sucks. Majorly. Worst onboarding ever
Support from @system76 has never ceased to come though for me. I can't say this about many companies at all.
Last month I got to visit the team behind System76 and the new Thelio line of desktops. It was a blast. Y'all should read up on the experience: https://ttmm.io/tech/system76-superfan/
Then go see if they have a rig to suit your needs ;-)